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Post by Deleted on May 11, 2019 0:47:45 GMT -6
Watched a show where a family of polygamists was put on trial. One wife worked outside the home. She had long days, was tired by the time she got home. For her, she loved the fact that during the day, her children were cared for by someone she trusts, who loves them, who can take care of situations like emergencies when they arise, and be there for hugs, affection, and reassurance. When the working wife gets home, there's a home cooked meal ready and the house is taken care of. The other wife loved the fact that after the day was over and she being completely spent, could send her husband to get his kicks in with the first wife or to watch the children while she drew a hot bath, sipped some wine, and generally relax and regroup.
I thought the arguments made were quite interesting.
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Post by KSSunflower on May 11, 2019 11:39:43 GMT -6
That arrangement was obviously worth it for them. Not sure it would be worth it for myself.
Unlike the working wife I don't want to entrust somebody else to take care of my kids. Most working moms I know work because they feel like they have to work.
Unlike the other wife, I don't want to be so exhausted from taking care of my children and her children to the point that I send my husband to have sex with somebody else.
I got married so that I could be the one to do those things with my h.
Although I can understand loving more than one person and desiring to be with others besides your spouse, you aren't always getting more. They may gain another spouse but in order to make it work you have to give less of yourself to each person.
Is it worth it? Depends on if you're ok dividing your time and affection between multiple spouses. For some people, giving up a little in one area might be worth it to get something you're not getting in another. For others, it may just be a loss, with little to gain from it.
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Post by edshubby on May 19, 2019 10:36:14 GMT -6
I don’t know if this applies to the women to which the OP refers, but sometimes women in polygamous marriages are not 100% on-board with the marriage. They were following directions from parents or spiritual leaders and don’t have any feelings or desire to be with their husband.
For these women, being able to send their husband to another wife to have sex would be a welcome relief.
So, in the case that maybe she wanted a different marriage arrangement but was submitting to another’s will, this arrangement doesn’t actually work for her. But in the case that she independently desired the marriage, yet didn’t necessarily care about her husband, this arrangement could work for her.
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