Role playing

I think I would like it and be able to get into it, but I’m pretty sure my wife would be a little self-conscious or think it was cheesy — which is really confusing because sometimes she criticizes / scoffs / rolls her eyes when I do cheesy things, but then other times seems to like such things in romance movies.

I think I’d like anything where she is in control and leading things, not in a pain inflicting, heavy dominatrix or BDSM way, but just taking control of her sexuality and seeking her own enjoyment. That would be really hot and sexually satisfying, if only because it would take some of the pressure off of me. Some light bondage where I “couldn’t” escape might be fun as well, but I think those scenarios rely on, again, seeing her in control, as well as unhealthy perceptions of sexuality. In my totally inexperienced opinion, being “forced” to experience pleasure is a way of giving someone permission to enjoy it or absolving them of latent guilt for enjoying it because it’s “not your choice”, when it would be much healthier to understand that you always have permission to enjoy sexual pleasure with your consenting spouse, not just guilt-free but as a positive good in and of itself. But maybe I misunderstand the underlying psychology here.

I also think I’d like scenarios where we pretend we might get caught (but where the risk is minimal). Like pretending that we’re doing something in a semi-public place instead of in our bedroom.

Other than that, I don’t know that I would care too much what the roles are, doctor and nurse, doctor and patient, police officer / traffic stop, boss and secretary, maid / nanny, repair man / delivery man / pool boy, etc.

Whether you’re LDS or not, I think playing out rape fantasies, choking, etc. are out of bounds. I think the difference between bondage scenarios and rape fantasies has more to do with the level of violence / actual physical harm involved and the level of respect and consent involved. Where fantasies of immoral behavior are concerned, I think those should be generally avoided — e.g. in addition to the above, scenarios based on prostitutes, threesomes, infidelity, etc. I just don’t see a valid reason for someone to need to roleplay raping someone or these other scenarios. At least in roleplays involving more acceptable occupations, they are based on the occupation, not something inherently immoral.

I'm game, she is not. We did once and it was a lot of fun.. I tried again and she told me she never wanted to do that again. So, since I have never brought it up.

As far as what? Pretty much any occupational type is a turn on to me. I have honestly not allowed myself to go there since it would just lead to discontent and possibly resentment.

Role playing has been discussed between us. It is a fairly new concept (last couple years) and we have yet to give it a try. Our only exposure to it has been Phil & Clair from the TV show Modern Family. We aren’t sure what we want to do.